carry_on

Why do scary movies alwayts take place in scary places like graveyards or hospitals? 
I want a scary movie in Walmart.

"Clean up on aisle 13"
"But sir... there is no aisle 13"
*dramatic music*

My parents legitametly believe that I am the only teen who spends so much time on the internet. Little do they know about all of you.

Me: Mom, can I have five dollars?
Mom: No. Money doesn't grow on trees.
Me: What's money made of?
Mom: Paper.
Me: Where does paper come from?
Mom: Trees.
Me: So money does grow on trees.
Mom: ...
Mom: you still can't have five dollars.