& i can never manage to put my thoughts into words; i never

&  i can never manage to put my thoughts into words;
i never know what to say, i never know what to do. i'm just so clueless about everything. i don't know what to do with my future, i don't know what to do with the present. i barely even know what ive done in the past.. i just want to stop breathing for a while, or maybe
forever.